Pre-E3 Rumors – I Hate Them

Every year when E3 rolls around crazy rumors start going around like wildfire on the internet, and it’s really fucking annoying. I will be the first person to tell you that I love the hype surrounding a game, but the super secretive shitty rumors that are created the few weeks before E3 are just stupid.

Anybody that thought the ZuneX pictures were real for a second are morons. That thing is just a 1st Generation Zune mirrored to make the screen bigger, and then they put xbox controller buttons and the fucking PS3 d-pad on the thing. I suck at photoshop and I could do that shit.

Then there was the leaked images of the PS3 Slim. It is obviously just some Chinese company trying to make a fake PS3 just like they do with everything else. Even entertaining the idea that there will be a slim PS3 at this point is absurd. They won’t come out with a smaller model until the regular HUGE PS3 is down to $200 or less. Also consider that the Engadget Japanese office received a Cease and Desist order from a personal gmail account, which just adds to the ridiculousness of it all. People need to think for one second before they believe this kind of bullshit. If anybody was going to be coming out with a smaller form factor console it would be Microsoft, and even that is extremely unlikely.

Also, if any sort of screenshot or video is released and it doesn’t come directly from the publisher or the developer, be skeptical. I know the Project Trico looks great and all, but none of that video looks to be gameplay and the kid looks like he is straight out of a PS2 game [Editor note: Rich is alone on this one]. I’m not saying that it is a fake video, it seems pretty legit, I am saying people need to stop believing everything that they see.

Joystiq put together a little bingo card for E3 predictions for Microsoft, and it sounds like they will be putting together more cards for Sony and Nintendo as well. Some of the predictions specified are legitimate and reasonable to make, I would assume that between Crackdown 2 and Forza 3 at least one of them will be shown, if not both. If Mass Effect 2 doesn’t get shown off it would be a huge disappointment, but announcing an Xbox Slim or a Blu-ray drive is even less likely than announcing MGS4 on 360.

There isn’t much time until we find out which rumors are right and which are wrong. E3 is less than a week away, unfortunately I won’t be attending but Golgotron will be represented by Alon, Josh, and Cory next week. For those of you in the same boat as me, you should head over to GameTrailers.com as they will be streaming the major press conferences the first couple of days, and I am sure they will have plenty of video to watch as it becomes available. I am hoping that Josh takes a bunch of booth babe pictures for us to post for your viewing pleasure next week.

Also, GameFork can go blow a herd of goats.

[update]

Joystiq just published a new article with their Sony bingo board here.