So el’ capitan has yet to let me know where my boundaries are when it comes to posting about, how should I say this… unethically acquired games. But in a vain effort to keep us up with the current state of gaming affairs I’m going to throw my two Lincolns in the circle and give you my take on the Advent Children demo. Now it’s been a while since I spoka ze Japanese, so I’ll preface this rant by saying I’ve got no clue what’s going on. I did my best to muddle through several Babel fish inspired translations. And while I’m sure they were only posted by the most reliable collection of Weeboos the interwebs has to offer, I still have to stress that if you’re looking for a story review you might want to venture elsewhere.

Best I can gather, the dual section demo follows the escapades of square’s latest collection of would-be heroes as they strike a blow against yet another fascist regime. Personally, I’m getting tired of the same “Damn the man” arc that Final Fantasy has been recycling for years. And with an art direction that looks “borrowed” from VII, for me the game isn’t promising a lot of originality. The game does start to show some upgrades in its cinematic to real-time transition and its battle system, but we’ll get to that in bit. After a lengthy opening you take control of… sigh, Lightning, yes that’s her name, and you embark on a quest to escape from some government train. Along the way Lightning… God it hurts me to type… to hell with it her new name is Mila Jovovich + (the “+” stands for the C-cups she’s been enhanced with). Anyways, Mila + is escaping and along the way she joins up with the contender for cosplay outfit of the year, Sazh. Who, for all intensive purposes might as well as been dubbed “Sweet Sweetback” because I’m pretty sure Square’s team’s only real basis for the character came from watching 70′s grindhouse flicks. Together, they fight things. I really don’t know what else to say about it. Much is the same with the second section, only replace Mila + with the male lead Snow. God damn you Square…

On with the show, the battle system works in a similar fashion to that of XII’s however they’ve reverted back to the cut away battle screens. While the regression will probably raise a few eyebrows, from what I can gather there was probably no way to keep it all in real time without causing massive slow down. While in battle mode, you again are left to move freely as you wait for your time gauge to fill and deliver your next barrage. Here’s the kicker, your moves now not governed by a one action per turn limit. Instead you’re now presented with three segments of a meter that you can use to effectively macro a series of attacks. While normal attacks only drain one partition, more powerful spells or combos can pull down all three, thus adding a new level of strategy. You can queue up the moves in whatever manner you wish, combo’ing the behemoths of XIII with, more or less, a wondrous assortment flashing lights. Yay! Shiny!!! Also adding to this feature is the ability to now perform aerial attacks and combos. For instance, running up to an enemy, kicking them to the sky, then hitting them with a volley of ice or fire, or whatever. It makes watching the battles for once incredibly stylish and just, well, cool. From what I understand the “Evolved ATB System” (it’s current moniker), is only being a third complete in the demo, and will offer you a lot more options in the way of chaining when its final form is launched.

However, my biggest gripe is the same I’ve been harboring since I started reading about the changes in XII. The effort to make the games translate from the fight scenes we perceived back when we were still dealing with essentially animated gifs to match those of the acrobatic action sequences in Advent Children, does kind of detract from the traditional RPG experience. And while I know this has been part of Square’s plan all along, it is a little disheartening. For me RPG’s were all about deliberate thought and patience, not action. That’s why I believe the old system worked so well. Your battles were long and drawn out leaving you drained and wondering if you had enough potions to carry you further into the dungeon. The cinematics were always the flashy desert and reward that kept you going if only to give you a little more insight to the mental world you built up while playing. Again, while I know it’s been the wet dream of every fan-boy to have the two match up, now that I can finally see that line starting to blur, I’m beginning to think, and this could be the nostalgia talking, that the two should stay separate. There’s something off here that I can’t put my finger on. The closest I could come to placing it is like seeing your favorite book being translated into a mediocre movie. It doesn’t by any means change the book its self, but it does alter your perception of the book as now you’re constantly left with the influences of the film.

With the risk of sounding hypocritical based off the last paragraph, I have to say the game is gorgeous. I’m not sure why reviewers like to point graphical high points out as you could clear judge yourself from the screenshots, but this one is a beaut’! As mentioned before, the line between cinematic and gameplay is completely blurred, and nearly seamless. The artists for done a truly impressive job when it comes to keeping up the high level of detail and consistency. From main characters to NPC’s to backgrounds, everything is vibrant and alive. And while the demo is clearly a very small fraction of what I’m sure will be a massive game, if the visual can hold up the same throughout, the team will receive a bow from yours truly, which, at least in my mind, is something. That’s not to say that I didn’t see a fair share of graphical hiccups and stutters, but I’m just chalking it up to it being incomplete at the moment.

I keep hearing people talk about the demo taking an hour or so to complete, I think I got through it in around 30, so I really don’t have a lot more to go on. Honestly, I’m surprised I pulled this much out of it. I think the game is on the right track, a statement to which I’m sure few ever doubted. Personally though, I’m still up in the air. I’m hoping that when the localization comes through the story will prove me wrong and peak my interest again. But for now I’m left with this bland taste in my mouth as I wonder why I’m not more excited about this game… P.S. the black dude’s got a bird in his fro. I know there’s some kind of racist statement Square’s trying to make here. I’m just not sure what.