Just as American Idol attracts a subset of “singers” who have no business performing in public, Playboy is inundated with audition photos from women who simply shouldn’t be seen in public. Those are the girls Playboy puts in gaming shoots.
But there’s a more important question to be asked. Push yourself past the apparent fact that the girls used for Playboy’s Bayonetta lookalike contest are straight out of the trailer park (I know it’s hard, but try). Instead, ask yourself this: Did Sega pay to have this content produced as a means of disguised advertising, or is this collaboration between Sega and Playboy a pro bono job? Comment away.
As my gift to you, I’ve embedded the B-movie video clips of each Bayonetta below. I hope you like lollipops.
Ryan LovetteWeird name for a girl, but I’m willing to let it slide since she’s one of the less hideous of the bunch. |
Chernise YvetteSo, she may not fit the mold exactly, but don’t be a hater, color is beautiful. |
Kat KohlsI’m pretty sure she’s cross-eyed here, which is a bit endearing to me. I’m glad to know Playboy doesn’t discriminate based on chromosome count. |
Jillian KayeExhibit 312 for why the game industry moved away from live action cut scenes. |
Shannon JamesShe *is* Bayonetta. Don’t forget that, you bad boy… |
If any of this has somehow convinced you to play Bayonetta, you can get it at Amazon.com
Thanks to BoobieBlog.com for tipping us off to this wonderful bit of material.
… and for Belisle’s take on Bayonetta, read the article he wrote a couple weeks ago.
The real (fake?) Bayonetta made it tingle in my pants. These ones made me poop.
Huh? Now this is odd. While I couldn’t care less for Bayonetta, I – just like Belisle – feel a craving to go poop.
My guess is if you didn’t have a woman already and met any one of these girls randomly and they asked you out you would say yes.